Wednesday, December 16, 2009


So this is Christmas
And what have you done?
Another year over.
A new one just begun


I am a John Lennon fan.
One of the happiest memories of my life is dancing with my wife at our wedding to John Lennon’s Love

Love is living
Living love
Love is needing
To be loved


And one of the saddest was the news of his assassination the night before my 17th birthday.

John Lennon’s music has been important to me all through my life.

And then there’s Happy Xmas (War Is Over!)
For my entire life this song has been a tremendous weight on me every Christmas.
It hangs out there as a challenge. Another year gone by. Time wasted. Life wasted.
Every year Happy Xmas (War Is Over!) makes me feel... guilty.

So this is Christmas
And what have you done?


Well this year I finally figured out an answer for him.
This year, with the help of some really great Doctors, the care of the world’s greatest Nurses, the support of my amazing Friends, and the love of my wonderful Family
I KICKED CANCER’S ASS.

How's that, John?
Good enough?

Goddamned right.

Happy Christmas

War Is Over.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

What A Difference A Year Makes.



You know it if you have kids, or have ever closely watched kids grow, a year can make a big difference. Last year Katie couldn’t read. This year she reads - everything. Last year Coop looked up to Bonnie. Now he’s taller than she is. Fortunately, he still respects her. We’ll see if that still stands next year when he officially becomes a teenager.

A year ago this week I had barely enough red blood cells to get oxygen through my body. I had barely enough red blood cells to make my blood red. A year ago, I didn’t have enough platelets to keep a simple touch from bruising or to stop my nose from spontaneously bleeding. My blood ran like water. It was more like red Hawaiian Punch than red paint.

A year ago there was a leaky faucet in my brain drip, drip, dripping blood inside my skull. A year ago, I spent my birthday and Christmas in the hospital and New Year’s Eve in the ICU.

A year ago I thought Nursing was a smart career choice. Today, I know a good Nurse is the difference between Life and Death in the hospital. My Life. My Death. If there are angels walking the earth, they work as Nurses.

A year ago I thought that Doctors were overpaid prima donnas who should spend more time with their patients. Today I know they are worth every penny…

A year ago I thought Healthcare Reform was a good idea. Today, I know without a doubt that Healthcare Reform is an absolute necessity. Not just for me and my pre-existing condition, but for our country’s economic and social growth.

I know that the foundation of our democracy, the Declaration of Independence, cites “Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness” as unalienable rights – rights that cannot be taken away. I know that there is no Life without available healthcare. There is no Liberty when you are chained to a job for fear of losing your health insurance. And there is no Pursuit of Happiness when you live in fear.

The pursuit of profit from preying on the weak and fearful is never mentioned in the Declaration or the Constitution. I think it would be hard to pass any legislation guaranteeing that right. But some people seem to think that is the first and foremost purpose of our democracy: the pursuit of profit at any cost to our fellow Americans. Some people seem to think that successful capitalism requires a steady flow of poor, weak and fearful people. I think that’s lazy capitalism. I think that’s a capitalism that values fraud over innovation and determination. And I think that any form of capitalism that seeks to undermine our lives and families and swindle our neighbors is un-American.

A year ago I was dead but didn’t know it. Today I know I am alive, but will not live forever. And whatever time I have, I hope I can spend it making life a little better for my family and my friends and a little harder on those who seek to steal our life and our liberties and end our pursuit of happiness.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Okay. I Can Explain.



Some of the bulbs were out in the 10 year old snowman. It's easier to replace them while he's inflated.
Bonnie caught me in the act.

That's all.

Anyway, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

I sent it out as a reminder to friends and loved ones that:
I am still here.
I still have a sense of humor.
And that they should get checked because cancer doesn't care.